New Year’s resolutions bug me. All that goal setting and vowing and making promises to ourselves. They are pet peeves of mine. Why? Because when we break a promise to ourselves, as we inevitably will, we feel bad about ourselves. Nothing like not meeting our word count to make us feel bad.
I am perverse. I do the opposite of what I'm told: if they say 'don't,' I will; if they say 'do,' I won't. If I tell myself I must have a certain number of words written by Sunday, I inevitably won’t.
But if I say to myself, I’d love to listen to that old ‘Handy Man’ album by James Taylor and doodle with my thoughts tonight, I will write. If I say to myself, I’d love to walk and listen to a writing podcast and see what ideas come out of it, I will write. If I say to myself, I’d love to examine that note that I wrote on the meaning of dignity, I will write. If I say to myself, I’d love make a good bone broth tonight and muck around with my writing while it cooks, I will write.
It’s the feeling that will evoke a writing response in me, not the command.
For me, New Year’s resolutions should be all about forgiving yourself. Liking yourself and being compassionate towards yourself. Feeling this way is not about turning on the TV, thinking I’ll be kind to me and veg out in front of the box tonight. It’s more about turning your writing goals around to being a time that evokes enjoyment.
Writing is bloody hard work. Especially if you’re redrafting and revising. When it comes to the hard yakka (as we say in Oz), resolutions and vows can often be too ambitious to work. Making real writing time means transformation and transformation takes time. But so many writers give up before they see meaningful progress. They’ve created unrealistic goals that have led to frustration and burnout. They expect immediate results and lose motivation when change is slow. They’ve made their writing time all about work, rather than joy.
Remember why you write. What is the deeper reason behind why you write? Keep sight of that. Evoke the feeling of how writing makes you happy. Rather than making an oath or a pledge to yourself, remember the joy of writing. Do whatever you can to induce the spirit and emotion and serenity and peace around the joy of writing. Make that your daily ritual, rather than the resolution.
Pretty soon you will find yourself drawn to the writing moment. Very soon you will find yourself writing.
And remember, life throws things at us. The unpredictability of life can derail even the best intentions. Be kind to yourself when setting up your writing time. I think your writing will be more beautiful in response to that self-compassion.
In other news, check out our writer interview guests for early 2025.
Hope to see you every second Tuesday night at 7 pm Sydney, 9 am Italy and 8 am UK for our TIME TO WRITE chats. But remember, ultimately the correct time for your location is up to you. At the moment (until I return to Italy for the European summer) it’s always 7 pm Sydney time! We will start back on Tuesday January 21st.
Our early 2025 Time to Write schedule is below. This Zoom invitation is recurring so will not change. Save it! 😊 Then we write together for one hour in silence.
January 21st Shelley Dark: The journey toward the Indie publishing decision.
February 4th Ashley Kalagian-Blunt: Those plot beat decisions!
February 18th: Morag Pringle: Revise, review and re-draft or die.
Break for March 6-9 for the Art of Writing in Brisbane.
Resume April 8th: Paul Daley: Don’t know topic yet. Just had to get him!
April 22nd: To be decided.
Subscribe to the Art of Writing Newsletter here to make sure you don’t miss out on anything.
Lisa